A quick rant about football

I hate football (soccer if you’re from over there).

I know this is not a particularly popular point of view, especially as millions, nay billions treat it as a virtual religion but I hate it.

Perhaps it’s the fanaticism that goes along with it. Or the hooliganism. Or maybe it’s just the pointlessness of the whole game. Oh and NO, I’m not some kind of puff or gay boy nancy. I like sports in general but just have an aversion to football. Two sides get together and kick a ball around and try to score goals. Fair enough, but then the play consistently goes something like this…

(commentators voice) - Rooney’s got the ball and so England’s in with a chance again. Rooney charges up the field… oooohhh he’ challenged but, ooh, ooooh, there’s an opening (pitch of voice gets higher), there’s an opening, oooh Owen’s there… Rooney kicks the ball up field and Owens there to receive… ohh, ohhhh, ooooohhhhh, he’s charging up the field, he’s close to the penalty area, ooooohhh can he get it through, no it’s blocked but wait (now shouting), there’s Beckham and oooohhhhI think I’m going to explode, Owen passes it to Beckham, ooooohhhhhhh Beckham’s in the penalty area, HE SHOOTS and aaaarararrrrrhhhh… the ball goes into orbit to land somewhere in the Gobi dessert. What a disappointment… yarda, yarda, yarda.

After 90 or so minutes of this along with 30 minutes of extra time then injury time the score remains at nil-nil. I ask you… what is the f*@~#ng point.

It’s especially annoying now that the local council has decided to erect a giant screen in Spinola bay where hundreds of people can gather to watch the game. What’s wrong with that, you may ask? Well only that it would have been better had they given some thought as to where these hundreds of people are going to park their cars.

Last night they showed the final between Man U and Chelsea with hundreds there to watch. The streets around about were chaotic. Cars were double parked, blocking off roads, on double yellow lines across peoples garage entrances… everywhere. So bad was the situation that after popping out to collect some relatives from the airport, I returned home to find there was nowhere to park. I then spent the night driving around looking for a space in the end to find one only after the match had finished and the revellers returned to their cars for their respective journeys home. Even then it was a ten minute walk home.

I suppose though, the question remains… with all the illegal parking, where were the wardens? After all they could have made a killing in fines. But then I can probably guess…

They were drinking beer and watching the game with the rest of the crowd. Useless b@~#@*ds.